Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Healthy Insanity?

Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity
  • At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
  • Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
  • Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
  • Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
  • In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"
  • Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
  • As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
  • Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.
  • Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
  • Sing Along At The Opera
  • Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
  • Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
  • When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
  • When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your life! They're Loose!
  • Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."


Anonymous said...

I wanna try at least all of these.


Anonymous said...

Hey, I copied these and put them on the BBFI ladies list. Got several comments and thanks for a good laugh. I loved them!

Aunt B.